You know how they say that when you have a baby, your heart expands? I think that when my daughter was born, my heart expanded to love my mom more, too.
personal
Fail like a mother.
I have a journal that was gifted to me when I was pregnant. The concept is that you document everyday motherhood — one happy thought, sentence, sentiment, memory every single day.
It’s a wonderful journal, but when I think about it, I feel like a failure. I miss documenting a lot of days — lately, most days. My go-to entry on days that I forget to journal is, “Oops!” I used that a lot the first year she was born. I just couldn’t keep up. When I got to year two of her life, my stomach sank every time I came across an “Oops!” entry from the year prior.
“What happened that day last year?” I’d think. Did she hit a new milestone? Was she happy that day or fussy? How many teeth did she have?
I still come across those entries. The big gut punches are the days I come across where I’ve missed both years to-date. 2015: Oops! 2016: Oops! I know I’m on track to three-peat some days. Next year, I’ll look back and come across days that I have never journaled. 2017: Oops!
Not journaling makes me feel anxious, regretful, and inadequate, but I also recognize that not journaling probably means I am tired — from reading an extra book at bedtime, from working all day so I feel good, from prepping her lunches for school, from a nightcap that made me fall asleep on the couch (again).
I guess what I’m saying is that I’m not too shabby.
The way it is.
Ever since bebe was born, my husband and I have had a nightly ritual of cuddling on the couch to look through our phones together and share all of the photos and videos we captured that day.
As she approached one year old, the daily pictures become weekly and eventually monthly progress pictures.
When she turned two, we just snapped what we could when we could, and that’s left me craving something.
I started this blog because I didn’t want to miss anything. And maybe the lack of photos is an indication that I’m succeeding — that I’m participating in my life — but I don’t want to regret anything.
This is a day in the life — an actual day in the life, complete with crusty noses, messy kitchen counters, and canine eye boogers. This is my stopping to smell the roses.
Lately.
Bebe outfit details: Chloe kids dress, baby Pumas
Mama outfit details: maxi dress
It’s been over 6 months since I last posted. Bebe has grown a lot. A LOT.
How can I even summarize at this point? Try, try, try:
- She walks (she runs)
- She wears a ponytail
- She eats (and eats)
- She pets the dogs
- She dances
- She talks (well, some)
- She has teeth we brush
- She has nails we cut
- She holds my hand
- She has stinky feet
Man, I love this girl.
(Not) problems.
Outfit details: romper, moccasins
Things we are dealing with lately:
- Daylight Savings Time Photo-taking is hard when it’s already dark by the time you get home.
- Feeding Solids I don’t know what to feed bebe, because I basically only eat take-out.
- Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease Why is it called that when it affects your entire body?
These are not real problems. Life is so good and sweet, and we are lucky people.
Real talk.
I’m still on the fence as to whether or not this blog is a good idea.
I left my stressful job in ecommerce at a global tech company one month ago to reassess what is important to me. I recognize that this time off was a wonderful opportunity (#supportivehusband) to figure out life’s next steps, and I found that I really missed working. I want to be with my baby, but I also find it empowering to work outside the home and provide for my family.
Thankfully, I quickly received two job offers. I started my new gig this week, and my hope is that it will be rewarding while still allowing me to be present for my daughter, husband, and our pups.
Balance is hard — my work, friendships, frappuccino habit. All of it.
What the hell does that have to do with what bebe wears? I’m not sure if I can articulate it. I have two photos from the day she was born. It feels like time has flown by — just as everyone warned that it would — and I can’t help but feel that I’ve missed something. This blog is about more than how I dress my baby. I don’t want to miss anything else.
I’m just a new mom trying to wing it with as much finesse as I can muster.
Good will, interrupted.
I have been cleaning out bebe’s closet regularly, swapping in new clothes for the outgrown onesies and such. Everything is organized into two categories – donate and keep.
I’d never considered myself particularly sentimental. Having a baby transformed me. I’m not Level 1 “Keep Belly Button Stump” sentimental, but I surprised myself when I couldn’t muster the will to put the bags of clothes in my car for donation drop-off.
I acknowledge that someone else could benefit from the useless (albeit adorable) pockets on her baby denim shorts. But as I looked down at the tiny odds and ends that once fit my babe, they took me back to those sweet first weeks of newborn skin and toothless smiles.
I’m just not ready to let go, yet.
#bebegirl
My daughter is 7 months old, and naturally, I think she’s the best baby in the history of all babies. When she’s napping, her dad and I are talking about her and/or watching videos and photos of her. To be clear, we are obsessed with her.
She has 6 teeth, wears 12-month clothing, and loves playing hard-to-get with her dad. She is an awesome sleeper and enthusiastic “bah-bah-bah”-er. She is my first human child and sister to three lunatic canines.
While I was pregnant with my daughter, I foresaw a practical lifestyle in which my little one would strictly wear hand-me-downs and plain white onesies – ya know, since littles grow so fast and all.
That’s all well and good, except Etsy. God damn you, Etsy. I NEED the custom-made organic shorts that my baby will wear exactly one time. Those baby moccassins? Bring ’em. Oh, and that natural wooden teether with her name burned into the wood by hand — go ahead and put me down for one of those, please.
Here’s to finding that balance between the practical and impractical, capturing special moments with my girl along the way.
Hello, Blog.
I am Jen, and this is my blog. I haven’t actively blogged since Xanga was in its heyday and I was planning a wedding (read: it’s been a while).
So, what in the world am I doing? I had a kid, and she’s scrumptious. She’s a sweet, plump little babe who is too young to object to my sartorial R&D. For full disclosure, I have no idea what I am doing, but I’ve discovered that a wee wardrobe of petite denim vests, fedoras, and graphic tees can yield a bit of fun and a lot of memories.
Anyway, welcome to our little space on the internet where I document what my bebe wears.
bebewears 